So we had it all planned out. The girls were sleeping over at my parents house. My husband and I were going to do some shopping, followed by dinner with friends and a comedy show.
Dinner was delicious. I heard the comedy show was quite funny, but I will never know because I managed to trip on a cement parking barrier in the parking lot and fall flat on my face in quite dramatic fashion, cutting my face, hand, knee and toe. Miraculously, my favorite shoes survived the ordeal without a scratch.
So much for romance.
My husband spent the rest of the night cleaning and bandaging my cuts and sitting up with me through not one but two old Ben Affleck movies just to make sure I did not have a head injury.
And our child free Sunday? I spent it on the couch with a bag of frozen fruit on my swollen eye while my husband did the grocery shopping and the laundry.
My mother sent over brownies and her homemade chicken casserole. The girls made adorable Get Well Mommy cards. My husband brought me flowers.
Today, I slept until ten o'clock and I am again resting on the couch as my sweet husband handles the school run, diaper changes, meals and activities for the day.
Forget romance, this is the closest I have come to actual time off in five years.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
no negotiation
Claire, how about every time you use the potty you get an orange candy?
Um, No!
How about every time you use the potty you get some money for your piggy bank?
Nope!
A new kitten?
Don't want a kitten.
A trip to Disney World?
NO.
*******************
Months ago, when my two year old started accompanying my five year old into the bathroom for pretend "school" classes, I rushed out and bought her her own little potty. If she was going to be hanging out with her sister while she used the bathroom, she might as well have her own little potty so she could do the same thing that big sis was doing.
Throw in a little praise and encouragement, and I thought potty training child number two would be a breeze.
Heh.
With her third birthday fast approaching, my daughter will not so much as sit on the potty, even once, and no amount of encouragement, praise, reverse psychology or flat out bribery will change her mind.
She likes her diapers just fine. She will not use the potty.
She will not negotiate.
Advice? Please?
Um, No!
How about every time you use the potty you get some money for your piggy bank?
Nope!
A new kitten?
Don't want a kitten.
A trip to Disney World?
NO.
*******************
Months ago, when my two year old started accompanying my five year old into the bathroom for pretend "school" classes, I rushed out and bought her her own little potty. If she was going to be hanging out with her sister while she used the bathroom, she might as well have her own little potty so she could do the same thing that big sis was doing.
Throw in a little praise and encouragement, and I thought potty training child number two would be a breeze.
Heh.
With her third birthday fast approaching, my daughter will not so much as sit on the potty, even once, and no amount of encouragement, praise, reverse psychology or flat out bribery will change her mind.
She likes her diapers just fine. She will not use the potty.
She will not negotiate.
Advice? Please?
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
mommy performance review
This morning I brought my preschooler to school in pajamas. Unfortunately, pajama day is next Friday.
Normally, I would just laugh off this sort of thing, but last month I brought her to a birthday party on the wrong day. And I got school picture day wrong too. Honestly, I could keep on linking because my archives, it would seem, are filled with documentation of my screw ups. But while one off screw ups are funny, having a scatter brained idiot for a mother is not.
Back in the corporate world, we had a review system. Peer review, upward feedback, self evaluations and quarterly reviews by your manager. In the business consulting world feedback is important. You always know exactly where you stand and it translates nicely into bonus dollars.
In my three years in the mommy world, I have not gotten a single review or a single bonus. There are no clearly defined goals and no job description that outlines what I am supposed to be doing.
So how am I doing? Am I a good mother? A decent mother? Or am I completely screwing this up?
On the positive side, I bake lots of cookies. My kids play outside every day. Every day. Even when it rains. My house is often filled with kids laughing and playing. We frequently take trips to the park, beach, playground, Children's Museum and zoo. We attend parades. I read to my children often. We eat home cooked diners as a family. We have a bedtime routine. I am always on time for school pick up. I take my five year old to gymnastic and soccer lessons. I kiss my girls often and make sure they know that I love them. I make sure we take time to enjoy the little things together.
On the other hand, I don't organize craft projects. My children watch too much Nickelodeon. I welcome playdates because sometimes I just don't feel like playing with my kids. My almost three year old is not even close to being potty trained. My children rarely pick up their toys or clean their rooms (unlike her kids). My children often have dirty faces. I am often late for school drop off. My almost three year old is not involved in any activities. My five year old is still overweight. I don't have as much patience as I would like. And clearly, I need to make better use of my calendar.
Am I a good mother?
How the hell do I know? I clearly could be a better mother.
I do know that my daughter was thrilled that she got to be the only one in pajamas at school today. And that she is even more thrilled that she gets to wear her pajamas to school again next week.
She is happily watching Nickelodeon as the baby naps and I write this. Maybe when I am done, I will break out the craft supplies. That should get me one step closer to that big mommy bonus, right?
Normally, I would just laugh off this sort of thing, but last month I brought her to a birthday party on the wrong day. And I got school picture day wrong too. Honestly, I could keep on linking because my archives, it would seem, are filled with documentation of my screw ups. But while one off screw ups are funny, having a scatter brained idiot for a mother is not.
Back in the corporate world, we had a review system. Peer review, upward feedback, self evaluations and quarterly reviews by your manager. In the business consulting world feedback is important. You always know exactly where you stand and it translates nicely into bonus dollars.
In my three years in the mommy world, I have not gotten a single review or a single bonus. There are no clearly defined goals and no job description that outlines what I am supposed to be doing.
So how am I doing? Am I a good mother? A decent mother? Or am I completely screwing this up?
On the positive side, I bake lots of cookies. My kids play outside every day. Every day. Even when it rains. My house is often filled with kids laughing and playing. We frequently take trips to the park, beach, playground, Children's Museum and zoo. We attend parades. I read to my children often. We eat home cooked diners as a family. We have a bedtime routine. I am always on time for school pick up. I take my five year old to gymnastic and soccer lessons. I kiss my girls often and make sure they know that I love them. I make sure we take time to enjoy the little things together.
On the other hand, I don't organize craft projects. My children watch too much Nickelodeon. I welcome playdates because sometimes I just don't feel like playing with my kids. My almost three year old is not even close to being potty trained. My children rarely pick up their toys or clean their rooms (unlike her kids). My children often have dirty faces. I am often late for school drop off. My almost three year old is not involved in any activities. My five year old is still overweight. I don't have as much patience as I would like. And clearly, I need to make better use of my calendar.
Am I a good mother?
How the hell do I know? I clearly could be a better mother.
I do know that my daughter was thrilled that she got to be the only one in pajamas at school today. And that she is even more thrilled that she gets to wear her pajamas to school again next week.
She is happily watching Nickelodeon as the baby naps and I write this. Maybe when I am done, I will break out the craft supplies. That should get me one step closer to that big mommy bonus, right?
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
cabin fever
My couch is filled with jelly beans.
Every time my little one sneezes her face is covered in snot.
My laundry basket is overflowing despite the fact that my washer seems to be running constantly.
My five year old's habit of repeating every question at least ten times is driving me insane.
Every day is different, but somehow the same old thing.
I have no energy and no enthusiasm.
My closet is filled with black. I am sick of black, but I need to hide my lumpy middle somehow.
I have eaten entirely too much kielbasa and too many chocolate chip cookies this week.
I am tired of the world being cold and bare.
I am tired of worrying about the financial state of our country, our world and our little family.
I know that there are much bigger problems in the world than mine. I know that I have much to be thankful for.
But seriously, we need some Spring around here.
Every time my little one sneezes her face is covered in snot.
My laundry basket is overflowing despite the fact that my washer seems to be running constantly.
My five year old's habit of repeating every question at least ten times is driving me insane.
Every day is different, but somehow the same old thing.
I have no energy and no enthusiasm.
My closet is filled with black. I am sick of black, but I need to hide my lumpy middle somehow.
I have eaten entirely too much kielbasa and too many chocolate chip cookies this week.
I am tired of the world being cold and bare.
I am tired of worrying about the financial state of our country, our world and our little family.
I know that there are much bigger problems in the world than mine. I know that I have much to be thankful for.
But seriously, we need some Spring around here.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Monday, March 16, 2009
toddlers and sushi
This morning, my two year old cried "I want to pick sushi over there" as I pushed our cart past the area of our local food store that contains the sushi station.
"Sorry, honey, but we are having pizza for lunch at Angela's house today" I replied, sure that this would excite her.
"Want. Sushi." she replied with a pouty lip as her tiny feet banged against the cart in protest.
Sushi used to be my lunch treat. Now it is our lunch treat.
I think it is safe to say, my kids are not picky eaters.
Parenting magazines are filled with elaborate ideas involving dips and animal shaped foods designed to get children to try new foods.
My own father's method was very simple. If you refused to eat something, he ate it. Right off your plate. His theory was you would think you were missing something good and next time you would give it a try. And either way, he was not going to let perfectly good food go to waste.
I remember eating some pretty terrible white fish, canned beets and canned green beans as a child but I really don't recall ever going to bed hungry.
Naturally, I go easier on my own children.
I never make separate meals for them, but I do tend to make meals with at least one vegetable I know they like and meats that are very tender and easy for little mouths to chew. I do involve them in the shopping, the cooking and the planting our garden in the spring. I cook mostly from scratch and spend an average of $75 a week on food. And on occasion, when Daddy is out, I do indulge them in good old Kraft mac and cheese or a processed nugget.
In addition to sushi, Claire's favorite meals currently include sweet meat (daddy's fall off the bone tender Braised Ribs) and spicy chicken peas (Spicy Sauteed Chickpeas, Beef & Cilantro).
Abby's favorites include Salmon Cakes and Pasta with Shrimp and Broccoli, which she has been eating since before her first birthday.
And both girls absolutely love avocados and my Sour Cream Noodle Bake.
As babies, neither one had any interest in baby food (although to be fair, I am not sure if we ever offered Claire any). They starting exploring food by eating off of our plates and they have continued to want to eat what we eat, especially if it is something we are reluctant to share with them (like, say, my sushi lunch).
My father, naturally, deemed my four year old spoiled this past summer as she ate a pile of steamer clams shelled by my husband and I. Apparently by age two, I was shelling my own steamer clams to avoid getting them eaten off my plate.
"Sorry, honey, but we are having pizza for lunch at Angela's house today" I replied, sure that this would excite her.
"Want. Sushi." she replied with a pouty lip as her tiny feet banged against the cart in protest.
Sushi used to be my lunch treat. Now it is our lunch treat.
I think it is safe to say, my kids are not picky eaters.
Parenting magazines are filled with elaborate ideas involving dips and animal shaped foods designed to get children to try new foods.
My own father's method was very simple. If you refused to eat something, he ate it. Right off your plate. His theory was you would think you were missing something good and next time you would give it a try. And either way, he was not going to let perfectly good food go to waste.
I remember eating some pretty terrible white fish, canned beets and canned green beans as a child but I really don't recall ever going to bed hungry.
Naturally, I go easier on my own children.
I never make separate meals for them, but I do tend to make meals with at least one vegetable I know they like and meats that are very tender and easy for little mouths to chew. I do involve them in the shopping, the cooking and the planting our garden in the spring. I cook mostly from scratch and spend an average of $75 a week on food. And on occasion, when Daddy is out, I do indulge them in good old Kraft mac and cheese or a processed nugget.
In addition to sushi, Claire's favorite meals currently include sweet meat (daddy's fall off the bone tender Braised Ribs) and spicy chicken peas (Spicy Sauteed Chickpeas, Beef & Cilantro).
Abby's favorites include Salmon Cakes and Pasta with Shrimp and Broccoli, which she has been eating since before her first birthday.
And both girls absolutely love avocados and my Sour Cream Noodle Bake.
As babies, neither one had any interest in baby food (although to be fair, I am not sure if we ever offered Claire any). They starting exploring food by eating off of our plates and they have continued to want to eat what we eat, especially if it is something we are reluctant to share with them (like, say, my sushi lunch).
My father, naturally, deemed my four year old spoiled this past summer as she ate a pile of steamer clams shelled by my husband and I. Apparently by age two, I was shelling my own steamer clams to avoid getting them eaten off my plate.
Monday, March 9, 2009
overheard at Rite Aid
How a toddler and a preschooler make simple errands fun:
Abby: "Mommy, what are you getting anyway?"
Me: "Medicine."
Abby: "THAT MEDICINE THAT KEEPS YOU FROM HAVING BABIES???"
Me: "Yes, honey, that would be the one."
Claire: "Can I get this Mommy? It is strawberry flavor!!" (frantically waving around a bottle of flavored personal lubricant that just happened to be by the pharmacy counter at toddler height)
Abby: "Mommy, what are you getting anyway?"
Me: "Medicine."
Abby: "THAT MEDICINE THAT KEEPS YOU FROM HAVING BABIES???"
Me: "Yes, honey, that would be the one."
Claire: "Can I get this Mommy? It is strawberry flavor!!" (frantically waving around a bottle of flavored personal lubricant that just happened to be by the pharmacy counter at toddler height)
Sunday, March 8, 2009
in review...
So it would seem that it has been almost two weeks since I wrote a post. What have I been up to lately? Well lets see...
Last Saturday our cat seemed healthy and happy, blending into the chaos and routines of the day, just like every other day of his eleven years with us.
Sunday our cat started throwing up.
Tuesday found me moving the cat around the house to his favorite sunny spots since I knew that this day would be his last day on this earth.
Wednesday morning found me at the vets office holding my dead cat in my arms.
Wednesday at around noon time my neighbor came by to take my girls for the afternoon with an offer to come by for tea if I felt like talking or being with the girls (which by the way, if you are like me and never know the right thing to do in social situations, is the perfect thing to do if you find your neighbor sobbing while chopping massive amounts of fruit with a rather large knife).
Thursday I took the girls shopping for sandals.
Yesterday it was 60 degrees outside.
I am hopeful for spring. Hopeful that I can be a more fun, loving and patient mother and wife. Hopeful that I can find joy in each day because like the cat, we are all healthy until suddenly we aren't.
I am also hopeful that more frequent and sunshiny posts are on the way...
Last Saturday our cat seemed healthy and happy, blending into the chaos and routines of the day, just like every other day of his eleven years with us.
Sunday our cat started throwing up.
Tuesday found me moving the cat around the house to his favorite sunny spots since I knew that this day would be his last day on this earth.
Wednesday morning found me at the vets office holding my dead cat in my arms.
Wednesday at around noon time my neighbor came by to take my girls for the afternoon with an offer to come by for tea if I felt like talking or being with the girls (which by the way, if you are like me and never know the right thing to do in social situations, is the perfect thing to do if you find your neighbor sobbing while chopping massive amounts of fruit with a rather large knife).
Thursday I took the girls shopping for sandals.
Yesterday it was 60 degrees outside.
I am hopeful for spring. Hopeful that I can be a more fun, loving and patient mother and wife. Hopeful that I can find joy in each day because like the cat, we are all healthy until suddenly we aren't.
I am also hopeful that more frequent and sunshiny posts are on the way...
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