the truth about motherhood?

The great, all powerful truth about motherhood? There is no great, all powerful truth. There are no magic answers. However, there are a few things I wish I had known about motherhood before becoming a mom:

I wish I had been more prepared for the possibility of needing a c-section. Birth plans are nice, but not all problems can be avoided by breathing and using a birthing ball as my child birth class suggested. During my daughters early days, I dealt with sadness and guilt over my failure to have the birth I envisioned, which is now the only regret I have about my birth experience.

I wish I had known how quickly day to day routines would change. What is annoying, frustrating and exhausting one day will change in a few days or weeks. And not because of any magic solution you find, just because children grow and change fast. Your life today will not be your life forever. Strangely enough, the things that have frustrated me the most are also often the things I miss about a particular age.

I wish I had known how helpful it is to find other moms to connect with, online and in real life. Parenting can be lonely, filling even the most confident of us with doubt. The masses of expert advice available in parenting books and magazines, even when intended to be reassuring, only intensified these feelings for me. But as I connected with other parents, I realized that no one else is living up to these standards either. I also realized that "expert" parenting advice is still just advice. At the end of the day, I am the expert on my family.

I wish I had not been so hesitant to ask for help. I was raised to be independent and take care of myself. Dependence on others does not come naturally to me. But slowly I have learned that asking for help is good for me and good for my children. It feels good to have people depend on me and it feels good to have people that I can depend on. Asking for help has enabled my children and I to build stronger bonds with our neighbors. The time my children spend with their grandparents has enabled them to build a close relationship, in addition to helping me. And when we get a chance to help someone in return, it allows me to show my children the importance of helping others.

And finally, I wish I had known that babies should not be awake for more than two hours. If your baby has been awake for 2 hours, you should put it to sleep. I am not much on strict parenting rules of any kind, but this one works like magic.

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There’s a lot about motherhood you wish you’d known before becoming a mom. Write about it anytime between now and Sunday, then send a link to your post to PBN. It’s this week’s Blog Blast, sponsored by Discovery Health and their new series “Deliver Me”.